With the exception of the mosquitoes, I’ve also neglected to write about other creatures sharing our house. There are many.
First and unfortunately foremost, there’s Mr. McChompersons. Jess named him. He’s a mouse, but there are more likely many of them. At first I thought I didn’t mind him so much. And then he came for me.
It started when I left a bag of pita bread out one night. I woke up to a human sized bite taken out of about four pitas. He’d eaten through the plastic to get to them. I was not happy, but still largely indifferent to his existence.
That’s when it got personal. I found a hole in my eye mask one day. The little shit made a hole in my eye mask to get to the flax seeds inside. I put the eye mask on my nightstand so he couldn’t get to it. And then he did. I came home to a ring of half eaten flax seeds around the hole. I don’t even want to know he got up there. He’d declared war. What a dumb mouse, I was one of his few allies in the house.
And now that I’m noticing it, there’s mouse shit everywhere. It’s disgusting. We need to kill him or them.
Especially now that we’ve got Fatty and Flaco with us.
First and unfortunately foremost, there’s Mr. McChompersons. Jess named him. He’s a mouse, but there are more likely many of them. At first I thought I didn’t mind him so much. And then he came for me.
It started when I left a bag of pita bread out one night. I woke up to a human sized bite taken out of about four pitas. He’d eaten through the plastic to get to them. I was not happy, but still largely indifferent to his existence.
That’s when it got personal. I found a hole in my eye mask one day. The little shit made a hole in my eye mask to get to the flax seeds inside. I put the eye mask on my nightstand so he couldn’t get to it. And then he did. I came home to a ring of half eaten flax seeds around the hole. I don’t even want to know he got up there. He’d declared war. What a dumb mouse, I was one of his few allies in the house.
And now that I’m noticing it, there’s mouse shit everywhere. It’s disgusting. We need to kill him or them.
Especially now that we’ve got Fatty and Flaco with us.

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